What do you call a white sheep with no legs? A cloud What do you call a black sheep with no legs? A shit.

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words are merely the smallest element of language capable of containing meaning and isolation and, as such could never directly produce the 4,000 Newtons of force per square centimetre required to break bones.

why did tom shut his bedroom door? grandma was fingering herself

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

what did the one girl say to the other girl? i like your shoes.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cock in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

why was six afraid of seven? because seven raped sixes mom

Q: What's black and hangs from a tree? A: A tire swing.

What is the best Anti-Joke ever? Your Mom. :(

Why didn't the mexican have a job? because he was working on his masters degree

What did Canada say to America? We will not become apart of the United States where people are known as Fat Nascar lovin hicks!

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender in five states.

What did George Washington tell his men before they got on their horses? Men get on your horses.

why can't hellen keller drive? Because she is visually impared and there for it would not be safe for her to drive

A man was walking down the sidewalk. Then he turned into a drugstore.

Knock Knock, Who's there? Banana. Banana who? The Holocaust.

how do you scare a deaf person? you yawn

A man walks into a bar He wakes up from his coma 21 years later and learns that humans now serve pumpkins as gods.

It is so hot out here, that it could melt an ice cube that was once in the freezer!

Q: If you're driving down the street in your canoe and the wheels fall of, how many pancakes does it take to shingle your dog's garage? A: 27, because bananas have no bones.

is it normal to be sexualy atracted to numbers?

How do you tell a crazy man that he is on fire? You're on fire.

What's the hardest thing about eating a quadriplegic? The wheelchair.

Two fish we're in a tank.. Yup.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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