Relax, it simply would not be working out for you if your mother was nearby, you see, the subconcious is limited by the concious mind, so if your subconcious can detect your mother (or anyone but me nearby) your conscious mind goes "uh oh" and it stops. Oh, right, and considering you can still type, how about we increase the effect into... I dunno, six billion? Yeah six billion. Anyway, the next time you want to experience it, just poke your nose, and since we do not want you to poke your nose off, you only do it once and you can yourself decide when it ends, at this level you should not be able to type, but if you want to type you can of course turn it off.

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What do a blueberry and a raspberry have in common? They are both commonly used in parfaits.

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Why did the black man go to hospital? To cure his black.

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A black man walks into a bar full of white people. And then... He orders his drink.

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What do you call an earthquake on Mars? There is not enough water on planet Mars for something like that to happen.

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What would you say if you girlfriend got hit by a train? Trick question, trains don't go through kitchens!

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WELL YOU ARE ALL A ROOF. So pie, my dearest Adam. Like a butthole.

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2 beavers enter a bar, destroy all the stool legs, and leave.

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What happenswhen a geman shepard jumps into a lake? it gets wet

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Knock Knock Who's There Not you... What? *Pulls out finger gun* *Screams BOOM!*

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Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

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my penis

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A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

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Two guys walk into a bar, have a good time, and exit the bar, relatively sober. They are driven home by a friend who agreed to be the designated drive for safety purposes and enjoy the rest of the evening with their wives, to whom they are happily married. Then the joke ends abruptly.

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What did I say to the joke? What? Correct.

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What did the Joker say to Batman? Why are we wearing these stupid costumes

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What is the best part about having sex with tweny-six year olds. There are twenty of them. ap~pac

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why was the black guy that was smoking weed in his car not sent to jail? when the cop pulled him over he thought he was black the way he was dancing but turned out to be white but that just looked black when hes dancing.

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How do you kill a blonde? Drench her in fluoroantimonic acid and watch her explode in a violent and gruesome death.

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the bully said, you're just small fries. the fries couldn't help it someone ordered a small!

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This joke is stupid, Chuck Testa.

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Why did the cook put rubber bands in the spaghetti Because he was an asshole

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally murdered 6's entire family.

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A bear walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "I would like a rum and............ Coke." The bartender asks, curiously, "What's up with the big pause?" The bear looks down at his paws, embarrassed, and mumbles under his breath, "social anxiety."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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