What's worse than finding half of a worm in an apple? a razorblade.

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Q: If a hen-and-a-half can lay an egg-and-a-half in a day-and-a-half, how long would it take a peg-legged grasshopper to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle? A: He'd give up.

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My friend thought that an onion was the only food that could make you cry, so I threw a watermelon at his face.

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if 5+5=10 then 7+9=52

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How do you blindfold an Asian person? Take a price of cloth and put it over his eyes

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Three men walk into a bar. One of them is not planning to consume alcohol because they are responsible and he is the designated driver.

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You know what's natural? Bears.

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What would you call Martin Luther King Jr. If he was alive today? Alive

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Me and my wife set and watch the eleven o'clock news every night. My wife always thinks that she has the different disease that is mentioned each day. One night she was practically in tears telling me that she had the disease that was talked about that night. I looked at her and said "honey, there is no way that you have testicular cancer. You don't even have testiculars." The End

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why did the chicken cross the road? it didnt it got hit by a bus.

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What's worse than a fly in your soup? Cancer.

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A Buddhist priest, and mexican drug lord, and a 12 year old girl walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the little girl and says. "Honey, you're too young to be in here." the little girl looks around and says. "Oh, My mistake." and leaves.

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What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after being hit by a train.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller watch TV? Because at 19 months she contracted what is believed to be scarlet fever which caused an acute congestion of the stomach and brain which caused her to loose sight and hearing.

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what just happened when chuck norris falling from the sky..? Starts making a wish

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whats black? the colour

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You're momma is so dumb, she has troubles passing her math unit and should seriously consider a math touter

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Jeffery Dahmer. Oh, good, you're finally here!

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What rhymes with car? Not kangaroo

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knock knok Who's there The police, I regret to inform you your son was killed in a horrific traffic accident

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why was the kid laying in the middle of the baseball field? he was shot in the face then mauled by a bear.

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Well, I'm naked so I'm going to go.

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a black hispanic and asian man jump off a cliff they all die and their families morn their deaths

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A guy walks into a bar and says ouch.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops