Wha did the fireman say when he burnt his finger? Shit.

A paper cut is a tree's last revenge.

What do Richard and Judy have in common? Nothing.

Wanna know a secret? I didn't read or agree to the terms and services

A Jew, a black man and a Christian enter a bar. Black people werent allowed in at the time so he was escorted out. The Jew And Christian have a blast and the time of their lives that night.

What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? No, but considering there has not been a single man to walk on the moon since 1972, it'd be difficult to generate any kind of revenue on this natural satellite.

Person: hey buddy have you heard the greteat news Freind: yea you have aids Person: no my wife jusr became a pristatue an she had ten patients already i was her first

How come Pluto and Goofy are both dogs, but Goofy can talk and Pluto can't? Because Goofy can walk on two legs, and is therefore superior to Pluto in Walt Disney's eyes.

What has two legs? Half a cat

Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He died

What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

Why'd the black man smell awful... Because he hadn't showered in multiple days

How do you end a sentence

Where would you find 10 dead babies buried next to each other? In a cemetary.

How many pancakes does it take to make a dog house? None because alligators don't fly.

Whats black and blue and doesnt bruise? a bruise.

So, a man walks into a doctor's office. He says, "Doctor, it hurts when I bent my arm like this." The doctor tells the man that it is simply a sprained muscle after thorough examination.

Whats worse than anal sex Anal sex with razor blades

Roses are red So are you Cause you killed my dreams So I killed you

What is worse than writing a really terrible joke on anti-joke.com? Death.

If a blonde and a brunette fell off a cliff who would reach the ground first? The blonde because she was fatter.

Whats worse than finding out one of your grandparents died, finding out both your grandparents died.

One night a policewoman pulls over a drunk driver. She politely asks him to step out of his car. He willingly does so. She says, "Anything you say can and will be Held against you." He replies "BREASTS."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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