What do you call a guy walking into a bar Dave, because that's his name

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Grass is red, HOLY SHIT THE GARDEN'S ON FIRE

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why wasnt nathan invited the party? nathan's been dead for 5 years

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Why did the homeless man not get any ice cream from the store? Because he was not very bright and didn't try in school. Therefore he couldn't find a job or get his job back at the janitor at Go-Mart. This proves that not doing your school work correct can really effect your future. Plus they was sold out of chocolate.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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How do you take a shit?, by taking it to go.

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hard cheese

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why ya gotta be so rude? cause i can

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Peter charas threw a masterball at a level 20 Zubat!!!!!

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What is brown and smells like sh!t Actual sh!t

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What is holocaust victim's favorite food? Hamburgers.

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What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

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If Voldemort was gay who would be his partner? Happy potter

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Why didn't little Billy cross the road? He was dead.

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Justin's life

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A: Ask me if I'm a tree! B: Are you a tree? A: No.

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How do you cheat your friend up Throw a BRIC at her face.

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Whats the difference between the Pope and acne Acne doesn't get onto a kids face until they're 13

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Why is it bad to smoke in a public place? Because secondhand smoke may cause lung cancer.

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A Priest and a young child walk into a dark alley.... It leads to a church and he talks to the young boy about God

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're adopted.

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Why did the school fall? Because a hurricane hit.

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An Irishman, a Zimbabwean and a South African walk into a bar... oh wait, it's just the English cricket team.

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*there was a tv sitting on the side of the road..* person 1: hey why doesn't that tv work? person 2: because it's broken?? person 1: no..because its not plugged in!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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