Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Bushes are red, Oh shit, my garden is on fire

someone jumped off a bridge he died

How do you make a dog drink? Put one in a blender.

justin beiber sucks

A Jew walks into a wall with a boner. He breaks his nose.

Question: why did the pilot crash the plane? Answer: because the pilot was a loaf of bread

Why was the cat unable to drink its milk? He was stapled to the wall

Why did the guy go to the store? He really doesn't want you to know every detail of his life.

Did I invite you to my birthday party? No. Then why are you at my birthday party?

Q: What lives in holes? A: Jerks.

Why was the lady afraid of rocks? Because her husband was stoned.

Why do black people like watermelons so much? They don't. It's just a stereotype.

Why can't the orphan play baseball? He can't find home.

Why did the smoker die at a petrol station? He had lung cancer.

Why did Mia fall off of Lucy's bike? Because Lucy didn't like Mia and shot her in the face.

What do gay kittens eat? Cat food. Friskies and Fancy Feast are both popular brands.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the baby fall off the swing? Because i hit it with a bat.

Wanna hear a funny story? Sure. Ok,

What did the leperchaun get at the bake sale? baked goods.

What did the Japanese kid get for his birthday? Nothing, his gifts were washed away.

How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit it with an axe!

VITAMIN C!

cccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccorn

I pregnant woman wakes in the night because she had a mis-carriage.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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