There once was a man called steve, His name was steve

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why couldnt the man stop the car rolling down the hill? Because he had no legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why didn't little Jimmy eat his dinner? Jimmy didn't eat his dinner because there was no food. Jimmy is a poor street urchin who died of starvation.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Yesterday I saw a blind man walking down the street, I asked if he needed help and he said "I'm fine thanks." Later on I saw a deaf man walking down the street and asked if he needed help. He didn't hear me, he then fell off the curb and was hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

How do you confuse and anger a blonde? Kill her family and loved ones and say you did it because potato.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A women was driving along in her brand new, swanky, red ferrari when she spotted a red light in the distance. She stopped steadily, following the rules of the road. All of a sudden a loud bang came from behind her where a young driver had hit her at 50 mph. They both come to an abrupt stop and exited their vehicles. The women says "Idiot, you just hit me!" The boys says "oh don't worry, I have insurance."

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Gawds Trololols: Jewsus: I die for ur Sins, now u are free! *argh* Gawd AD 3000: TIME TO DIE SINNERS! Jewsus: But I paid for humanity`s sins and am stuck in hell because of this and... Gawd: Meh just didnt really liek you TROLOLOL! Gawds Trololols 2 directors clit: Gawd: Jebus! (the third) I want you to trololol peeps now! GO! Jebus: As you see people, I have died for you in order to prove that I am immortal! Peeps: Uh, wow? Jebus: TROLOLOL! So dad, when am I gonna get back to earth again, I kinda promised my boyfriends/apostles that there would be a second cumming as you told me to do, and people have been waiting for over twothousand and fourtee... Gawd: Never! Trolololol! Moral: "Would you trust a being whose veins are loaded with alcohol?" Jesus 2: The second coming: In cincemas never!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A black man, a mexican man, and a caucasian man, walk into a bar with handguns. The three break out into a gun fight and everyone is killed in the cross-fire

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have Somthing To tell you F*** You

thumb_up thumb_down -20

HOLY SHIT, THIS ACTUALLY WORKS!! 1. Hold your breath? for 5 minutes. 2. Die

thumb_up thumb_down -20

q. What's the worst thing about your family a. There related to you

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Whats the Difference between a corvette and a pile of dead babies? A Pile of dead babies is basically useless

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's the difference between a baby and hot dog? I don't put ketchup on my hot dog when I eat it.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why was the minority sad? Because the police beat him and then he was raped in jail.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

How can you tell if someone is a global warming alarmist? Their IQ on average is 10 points below normal

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the oak tree say to the pine tree? Nothing tress dont speak regardless of the kind.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why was the little girl crying Someone therew a dump truck at her

thumb_up thumb_down -20

what is funnier than one dead baby in a dumpster? There is nothing funny about the homicide of a minor, and the murder should be immediately investigated.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why was the asian boy abused? He got an B in math

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the boy get nothing from Santa on Christmas? His parents died the night before!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A Nazi walks into a bar. No one really knows he's a Nazi and he doesn't talk about it that much in public, so he chats to some people then leaves after a few beers...

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could DO YO MOMM!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

I baked tonight. What did you bake? Brownies. What kind of brownies? Chocolate.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops