What's long and black? A black hockey stick.

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There are 2 muffins sitting in an oven. One muffin says "Damn, it's getting hot in here." The other muffing replies "Holy Shit! A Talking Muffin!"

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Why did the computer crash? Because it had too much alcohol.

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What's the difference between a police officer and a green dinosaur? They both aren't cabbages.

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What do you call a chicken? You say bawk bawk bawk bawk cockadoodledoo

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What's worse than Bogans? Boat people.

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Q: How are a plum and a rabbit alike? A: They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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A kid walks into the car and the dad says, "Wear your seatbelt".

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whats long, hard and full of seamen submarine

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There once was a girl who took away my source of entertainment. Her name was Nicole.

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Want to hear a joke? ...you're straight.

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.der era sesoR .eulb era steloiV .sdrawkcab nettirw saw ecnetnes sihT .yrgnuh m'I won dnA

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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I like my sex how i like my steak Pink and Bloody

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What did peter griffin say to the black guy? Oh you are black.

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Q. What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a trampoline? A. I don't were cleats when I jump on my trampoline.

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A male paltypus usually possesses two poisonous goads under his forelegs. Which makes him potentially more dangerous than a dragon.

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My Mom was strutting down the runway. Then she got trampled by a plane.

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Why did Sally fall off a tree? The tree was a man wearing a tree costume and was sexually assaulting her with his branches. Sally fell off because the cops came and the man threw her down. The tree man is still on the loose. If you have any info please call crime stoppers.

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How does a printer work? You plug it in.

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What's a good joke? France going to war and winning.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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Why did the genie not grant the man his 3 wishes? Genies don't exist, only vampires live in lamps.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops