What do you call a group of black men stampeding down a hill? Dangerous, so they should slow down!

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The worst part of waking up, Is no Folgers in your cup.

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"Lets begin, tell me about yourself," "ok, well first I'm a open book and..." "ok next" "why?" "I fucking hate books!"

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How do you confuse a blonde? You put her in a round room and tell her to find the corner.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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Which hockey player has scored the monst goals of all time? He-Shoot-Si Scores

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Jerry Rice is walking down the streets of San Francisco when all of a sudden he hears sirens coming from the next street down. He hurries down the road to see what's happening and sees a huge fire engulfing a 10 story building. And on the top floor, a lady is leaning out the window shouting to the firemen below. FIREMAN: Come on, lady, jump. We have the tarp here, we'll be able to catch you. LADY: No....I can't. My baby, my baby is up here. FIREMAN: Throw the baby down, we'll catch him. LADY: No, you'll miss. I can't leave my baby. Jerry sees this and steps forward. "Hey, I think I can help. Let me have the bullhorn." JERRY: Hey lady, I'm Jerry Rice, the wide receiver for the San Francisco 49er's. I'm the best wide receiver in the game, throw your baby down and I'll catch him, this is what I do for a living. Being a 49er fan herself, the lady recognizes Jerry and throws her baby down to him. Just as she throws it though, a huge gust of wind comes and takes the baby and starts to blow him off course. Jerry sees this and takes off after the baby. He hurdles the line closing off the area, fights through the crowd, dodges a couple of fire fighters, jumps over the car, and dives forward, just making a fingertip catch of the baby. The crowd around him goes wild and starts cheering his amazing catch. So Jerry jumps to his feet, raises his finger into the air, does a two step and then spikes the baby. If you have any dead baby jokes that are not here, I want to hear from you. Email me your dead baby jokes at skitzopathik@hotmail.com and I'll add them to this page.

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What's the difference between a Christian and a Jew? One believes in Jesus, the other doesn't.

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What is the cost of an abortion? 1 life

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Whats a hobbo's favorite food? Trash

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Your mother just died.

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8===D

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What's blue and invisible ? Nothing.... Its impossible to be iinvisible and a color

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We was all sat down at the table ready to eat then Gary must've said something to Lucy because she just burst into tears and left the table.

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Brian: Have you seen my slippers? Louise: What the hell are you doing in myhouse? Help ! Police! Brian: You have amnesia like in that film 50 first dates Louise: What film? I don't remember that Brian: Exactly

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WHat did the Somalian girl get for Christmas? AIDS

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How do you sink a Polish submarine? Hit it with a torpedo.

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I have 20 dollars and 27 cents. How much money do I have? 20.28$ I found a penny.

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What did the mom say to her daughter? I love you.

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what did the duck say to the other duck Quack

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What do you call a Jew in the oven? The oven repair man

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THE GAME

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A man walked into a bar....he's OK.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because on the other side of the road people don't question his motives

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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