What does an Israeli gun sound like? Jew, jew, jew, jew, jew

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How long does it take to paint a house with babies? It matters how hard you throw them.

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What time is it when an elephant steps on your watch? Time to go to the hospital and get treated for a shattered wrist.

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why was the toddler sad? he was diagnosed with cancer after his dog was put down because it raped and murdered his parents

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A horse walks into a bar and begins to moo. Everyone is confused until it takes off its costume and reveals it's just a cow.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? because she's a woman

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin after being attacked by a man with a mace.

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A: When was rhe last time you touched yourself? B: A few seconds ago when I had an itch on my arm

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What did the blond do on October 12th? Get hit by a bus

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What happens when you get hit in the face? You get hurt.

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why did the donkey kick the men bc he tryed to pen the tail on hes ass

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme But this one doesnt

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She had finished her breakfast and had to get to her job as a firefighter.

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Q: what do you call the green and the (stone eater) animal? A:the green and the (stone eater) animal

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An anti-Semite, a Jew and an American walked into the bar. The barman said: "Hi, Sara".

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justin beiber sucks

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BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH

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what is green and smells bad? an orange dolphin that poops out rainbows.

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Two men walk into a bar. The first man says to the bartender "I'd like some h2o". The second man says "I'd like some h2o to". The second man died.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Shoot it.

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What's better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retatrded

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No antijoke here.

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What did the T-Rex say to the chicken? Nothing. First of all because the Tyrannousaurus Rex has been extinct for over 65 million years and secondly because Tyrannousaurus Rex's and chickens are both animals of lower intelligence so they cannot talk to one another.

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Knock Knock Whose there? I have a gun and candy, get in the van

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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