What came first, the chicken or the egg? Well, to tell you the truth, I think that the chick-fa-lea came first.

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I've just been struck by an enormous bolt of lightning. I am covered in boils and my house is full of frogs. I strongly recommend that when referring to God, always use the upper case 'H' on all personal pronouns.

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What did the drunk homeless man get for his birthday? Liver cancer.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself pink and throw green banana at her.

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im 14, over weight and spotty! you interested? .... im desperate:)

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3 guys are walking in the woods there are 3 paths they each take a path. the first path lead to a shed that said blowjobs 25 cents the second path lead to the same place after they all made it threw the first guy said he got a blowjob so dose the second guy. the third guy said i made 50 cents

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? the holocaust

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What did the doctor say to the man on the nice day? You have cancer. How nice the day was is irrelevant

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I'm not gay (phrase) - A phrase commonly used by straight men.

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Why did the dinosaurs die out? This is a long and debated subject, and as no one was alive back then and no solid evidence has been found to support any theories we can only wait.

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Why can't you lie to atoms? Because they make up everything!

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

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What's worse than finding a work in your apple? The Holocaust.

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why did john wear a red hat? because blue is his favorite color

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Roses are red. Violates' are blue. Hitler is my homy.

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Your mother is so ugly, her genes were passed down through two generations, and now your children are of a similar caliber of ugliness. I'm so sorry.

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why does beyonce sing " to the left, to the left"? - cause black people have no rights

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What's 18 inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

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Knock Knock Who is there? The IRS coming to take your house

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What is brown and can't get an erection? Poo

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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What's the new green? Green

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Why cant the asian find his family? His eyes were too squinty

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A man comes into a bar. Wait, it's a horse. A man comes into a horse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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