What should you do if a stranger picks you up? Politely request that he put you down.

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What do you call a blonde who passed the SAT's? An excellent student.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar, the bartender says, "We have a drink named after you", the grasshopper replies, "you have a drink named Bob"

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What is white and flies upwards? A retarded Snowflake.

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Why couldn't the bartender sell alcoholic beverages? He got fired

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit her in the face with a ax!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because it saw some food, or because it felt threatened on the side of the road it was already on.

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jordan godfrey is good looking lolololol

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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What do Vladimir Putin and a snake have in common? A central nervous system, to name but one of the many biological similarities.

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What do you call a man with no legs? A leg-less man.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas?? - Cancer

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What's the difference between an apple and a fruit? None

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How do you fit a giraffe into a refrigerator? You cut it into pieces.

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Donald Trump

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You're in the middle of the ocean and you see a roller coaster. What color is the penny? Tree.

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When life gives you cancer, make cancerade.

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Whats 1 foot long and went in and out of my girlfriend? Our new baby

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[Insert anti-joke here]

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A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

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watched pride and prejudice last night. I hate period dramas... too much blood

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Jamie: Peter your hands smell like cows! Jason: eeh no they smell like cows balls

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fi uoy nac daer siht sdrawkcab uoy tsuj daer siht sdrawkcab

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roses are green, violets are yellow, I am a hybridizer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops