I am the best i am the worst My wife was buried in hearse

What's green and runs through the forest? - A pack of cucumbers. What's wrong with that? - Cucumbers aren't pack animals.

Teachers be like "Hold on class, I am almost done with my lesson!" Students: " Aint nobody got time 4 dat!"

Why did the loser end up in hospital? Because he was smoking glue.

If humans say YOLO what do cats say? meow.

What happened to the man who ate a piece of pizza after doing a lot of sit ups, while rubbing the belly of a fat man, and feeding his baby at the same time? He Lived

why did the Mexican eat a octopus because he was hungry would die if he didn't

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

2 penguins in a tub. one looks to the other an says, "pass the bar of soap." the other looks at him.."what do you think i am, a typewriter?"

What did Little Johny get for Christmas?

Roses are red Violets are blue We cant have sex I have ED

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? You shouldn't call him anything. He needs help. -Tag

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know you have to ask the chicken if you speak chicken

roses are read, violets are blue. i have alzheimers and Jill came tumbling down.

what do you call a clown in makeup? a clown, clowns are supposed to wear makeup.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am Jack Bauer, Where is the nuke?

Why did the girls hair catch on fire her neighbor bullied her

why did suzie fall off the swing? because shes autistic and her mother likes to abuse her.

Well this is pointless.....

A: Can I get a tall white Russian. B: No. A: Why not? B: Because this is a Barnes and Nobles. However, we do have a Starbucks, and I can offer you a venti caramel iced coffee"

What is the difference between tea pot and shinkansen? shinkansen is very quick train and tea pot is traditional piece of dishes..

Some say Helen Keller can't write a good book. You know what she said? Nothing.

Your so gay, that you like men!

what did the toe say to the other toe? nothing they cant speak

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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