What did the rug say to the floor? I got you covered

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knock knock Dave's not here.

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What do you call a person who drinks beer a lot? Alcohol abuser.

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Why did the black girls wear fancy clothes to the mall? Public nudity is considered a crime in many parts of the world. It would be advisable to wear clothes in public areas, so as to avoid being arrested.

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A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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Q: What did the dog say the cat? A: nothing, because dogs cannot speak, and even if they could, I highly doubt they would speak cat.

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knock knock whos there boo boo who? stop crying its only me! its not you, my mom has cancer, my dad was killed in a car accident, my pregnant wife has been murdered, and my uncle touches me.

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knock knock who's there? to to who? to whom*

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Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, If you do find one, what`s your plan?

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What did the asian say to the President of the United States? I don't speak English

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Chris Brown can do no wrong. False he acquired several wrongs through his mistreatment of several women.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for his birthday? A basketball.

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Did you hear the joke about the deaf mail man? No. Neither did he.

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Who is that? That is my daughter, She likes climbing trees.

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Why did Dean Jones talk to his car? Because it was Herbie the love bug , a car possessed by a demon that had voice recognition capabilities and thus could understand him

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A man walks into a bar not a duck though

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Whats brown and sticky? - A brown stick.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Ferrari? I ain't got a Ferrari in my car.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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A man walks into a dairy. Most people will not get this as it is cultural slang and they will think it is referring to dairy products.Oh well. This was going to be a good joke.

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Neither have I

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because it broke...

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What do you call a Black Man in the ocean? A scuba diver

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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