roses are green violets are green i was drunk last night

What do you call a black male teacher? A: A Teacher .

5 little monkeys jumping on the bed, one fell off and bumped his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "He has a mild concussion."

TRICERATOPS!

Some anti-jokes are funny, some are not!

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

Why didnt the chicken cross the road? Because he got hit by a bus.

How come Pluto and Goofy are both dogs, but Goofy can talk and Pluto can't? Because Goofy can walk on two legs, and is therefore superior to Pluto in Walt Disney's eyes.

why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

What happened when an FBI agent and a cop argued over control of a hostage situation? Several people including a respected community leader were killed.

Jane was playing in the back of the bus with an eyeball...up and down,up and down.An old woman asks her : Jane,what are you doing?She responds : I`m trying to see who`s the driver

What do you a black man who isn't flying a plane? Well, that depends on his occupation.

why are jews so cash hungry? because like the rest of us they are looking for a way to survive and feed their family.

A Horse walks into a Bar. The barman says "Why the long face?" The Horse had cancer.

whats wores than eating a vag. a gaint vag eating you.

Roses are red, violets are blue. i have Alzheimer's, cheese on toast.

What's worse than stabbing your eye with a fork? Stabbing both your eyes with a fork.

Why did the little boy ride his bike to school? It was a birthday present.

whats worse than 100 babies strapped to an atomic bomb? 1 baby strapped to 100 atomic bombs

why couldnt luke open the door? he had no arms

What do George Washington, JFK and Hillary Clinton have in common? They've never been to my house.

Patient: "So what seems to be the problem doc? Doctor: "I'm afraid you have AIDS. I'm sorry."

Q: What cat walks on two feet? A: Garfield Q: What mouse walks on two feet? A: Mickey Mouse Q: What duck walks on two feet? A: Donald Duck? A: No, all ducks you dipshit.

3 Blondes walk into a bar. One ducks, the other two are hospitalized with mild concussions

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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