I told my friend one of these anti-jokes, he took it seriously and beat my head with a bat.

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Q: A man, already drunk, walked into a bar. What did he say? A: Ouch!

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Why did the dog bark? Because he wanted to.

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The boy asks his dad if he can make him a sandwitch The dad reply's " no thats your moms job"

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what do you get when you cross a baby and a car a baby shaped dent, and a dead baby

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What do vampires cross the sea in?

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Q: What is black and white, black and white, black and white? A: A Nun falling down the stairs.

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What did the shit covered people licking each others scrotums call themselves? The Aristocrats

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An Indian, American and French man walk into the bar simultaneously. Unfortunately, they get stuck in the door.

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How often do you remember a dream? Well what if I told you that this is a dream go ahead pinch your arm. You probably didn't feel pain. And just incase jump out a fifth story window. Come on do it. Now if you are still reading this you are either dreaming or didn't jump out the window. Shame on you!!!!!!

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Hickory dickory dock, The mouse ran up the clock, Barbara called the exterminator, Who killed all 10 of them.

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Whats worse then the Holocaust? Chlamydia.

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Where's Waldo? In rehab. Waldo is in rehab.

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Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

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There once was a boy. On his birthday, he got a small puppy. The puppy was white and had big eyes. Boy loved his puppy and the puppy loved the boy.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have the Cadillac, Get the Guns

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A man walks into a bar... He has a severe drinking problem, and his wife weeps for him

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what did the tomato say when he was cut open? nothing, because vegetables are unable to speak

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the squirrel.

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The saying "When Pigs Fly" Can easily be canceled. Just tie a rocket and wings to it and let it go.

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"You must defeat Shen Long to stand a chance"

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Why was the gay man gay? Because he likes touching other guys penises

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What's liquid, clear, and tastes like water? H20

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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