Your Mommy is a gas pump.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's worse than getting an erection in church Getting an erection while naked in church

thumb_up thumb_down -19

your mumma so fat when she stepped on the scales it said her phone number

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you say to a blind man in a sunglasses store? Nothing. Why do you feel the need to bother strangers while you needlessly shop at your local merchandise outlet?

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's the difference between 10,000 dead babies and a Farari? I don't have a Farari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

WOKE UP THIS MORNING AND SAW PROSTITUTE OUT THE WINDOW AND SAID GRANDMA GRANDMA CAN I GO PLAY WITH THAT PROSTITUTE SHE SAID NO YOU CAN PLAY WITH ME BECAUSE I'M A PROSTITUTE TOO

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the blonde walk into the men's restroom? Because the blonde was a man who needed to expel his feculent waste.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Roses are Red, uh..uh..ahhhhh oh shit I just came that curse is true

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's worse than beating a dead horse? Nothing. Beating a horse is just too much fun

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Did you hear about the Australian man who was jumped by a gang of Americans with knifes? He had his cash and possessions stolen from him, and had to spend two weeks in hospital due to stab wounds.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Your mum is so fat, she is likely to do die before my mum.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

i stole a monkey from a man in a yellow hat his name is george now his name is i hate you

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Knock knock. Why do you say the words "knock knock" without actually knocking on the door?

thumb_up thumb_down -21

why was the monster truck late to the rally.. because it had no driver

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the Nazi solider receive on his birthday? A bayonet up his ass.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted better pay.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A girl hears a noise in the middle of the night in her kitchen downstairs. She walks down halfway through the staircase and asks if anyone is there, as if the intruder will say, "Yes, I'm in the kitchen. Want me to make you a sandwich?" *This will never happen. Movies are stupid when it comes to these scenes. No one will actually ask if anybody is there if they hear a noise in the middle of the night.*

thumb_up thumb_down -21

60+8.99999999=68.99999999 soo close

thumb_up thumb_down -21

roses are red violets are blue do i care? no.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A horse finds himself sleeping in the ocean. Immediately, he decides to be a dolphin.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the woman stop jogging? She got mauled by a bear.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the White lady say to the Black lady? Hello, how are you?

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a dear with no eyes. A mutilated dear.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q: If a hen-and-a-half can lay an egg-and-a-half in a day-and-a-half, how long would it take a peg-legged grasshopper to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle? A: He'd give up.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops