If a tree fell in the forest, and no one was around to hear it, would you like a cupcake?

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How does a dyslexic person read the word 'schitzophrenia'? Schitzophrenia. I leid abuot teh dyslxeia.

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Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

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Why couldnt Jimmy ride a bike? refrigerator

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What do you get when you stab a six year old with a pair of scissors and a machete? A very angry, potentially murderous mother out for revenge.

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Yo momma is so fat, that after boarding an airplane the flight crew respectfully asked her to deboard, as with her on board the plane would be exceeding the reccomended weight, and thus be unable to fly safely.

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A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a chair.

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what's worse than the holocaust? black people whats worse than black people? mexicans Whats worse than mexicans? 2 mexicans Whats worse than 2 mexicans? Africa

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THE GAME.

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"I never want to see you again!" shouted Stevie Wonder to the genie in the bottle, as a young boy.

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If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? -Allergies.

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You know what happens when you assume? You make a judgment based on incomplete information.

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I'm Ryan Dunn, and this is a 120 mph car crash

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A man was walking down the street He was then killed in a drive by.

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What is 5 brittish guys who can't sing and horrible music make .... one direction

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A man walks into a bar and sits down. The bartender then lights him on fire.

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Nero, please cut the bull, I know you work for the feds, you are involved with the FBI, I know, but its not my problem, I just do not like you lying to me.

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Why did the old lady talk to a tree? She had Alzheimer's and was going to die.

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What do you call a black man eating a chair. I don't know and this is highly unlikely because chairs are inedible therefore this circumstance is impossible.

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What did the little girl with no legs or arms get for Christmas? Cancer. Knock knock? Who's there? Not that little girl.

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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How do you fit four gay men on a bar stool? You build an exceptionally large bar stool

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How do you tell if an alien had been in your house? All your lightbulbs are gone and your fridge is pregnant.

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You read this in school as the kid sitting next to you stares at his computer screen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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