What did the blind man say to the fish store owner? I would, 1 fish please.

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"DUDE! THERE IS A KNIFE IN YOUR LEG!" "SERIOUSLY!"

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A man approaches an attractive young woman at a party. He asks her if a rag smells like chloroform and proceeds to hold the rag up to her face. She passes out, the man takes her into a nearby bedroom and rapes her. He casually leaves the party. He will most likely continue this vile act for years to come.

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Phew, I was like thinking all like "I am really into this guy, we can like chat like this and stuff too right?"

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What did the 20-year old woman say too the old man? HI GRANDPA!

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What's funny about 9/11. Nothing.

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what do hookers and bungee jumping have in common? They are both 100$ to be in/on and if the rubber breaks your screwed

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An indian boy asked his Dad,'Why do we have such long names?' His father didn't reply, he died on the road home.

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Why did little Annie fall off the swing? Cause her penis was too heavy.

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A chicken rode into town on a horse named Friday. He was later shot by a dyslexic Russian dinosaur.

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What's worse than 10 babies stapled to a tree? The Holocaust.

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I baked a pie once. Guess what flavor it was. PIE FLAVOR!

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Why didn't little Jimmy eat his dinner? Jimmy didn't eat his dinner because there was no food. Jimmy is a poor street urchin who died of starvation.

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Why do dyslexic people stink at typing? c k j a h s d i u p q h g n z v m n k b e r t y o f This is why...

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How can you tell if there is an idiot at a dogfight? When someone pits a Chihuahua. How can you tell if there is a moron at a dogfight? When someone BETS on the Chihuahua. How can you tell if there is a cheater at a dogfight? When the victory goes to the Chihuahua.

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Want to hear a joke? Women's rights

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one day a bear was eating for winter he ate about half what he had to and said "Im tired ill take a nap and eat the rest later. one month later he died of starvation

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Unfortunately there are billions of chickens in the world and based on the question it is not possible to determine which specific chicken is being referred to. Even if we were able to ascertain this knowledge it would be unlikely that we could determine its purpose, as chickens don't usually make decisions based on logical thought.

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Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

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What's up? Not the Twin Towers.

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What do you do when a taco eater gives you guacamole? Thank him, and politely smash it in the face of the nearest trashy tourist.

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who sells coke and ruins lives? Vagina Parker

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What's worse than being arrested by a cop? Dying of AIDS.

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What did Mel Gibson say to his wife? I apologise for my rude behaviour and intolorable cursing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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