Why did the woman accuse a black man of stealing from a bank? Because she was eating a cornmuffin on the bench across the street when she saw a black man,stealing money from a bank

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Does this smell like chloroform to you?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a car

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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Who is that? That is my daughter, She likes climbing trees.

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knock knock ? Who's there ? idunnop idunnop who ? Eww you've done a what?!

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them Why did Jane fall off the swing She has no arms Why did Jack drop his ice cream cone He got hit by a bus Did you know that if you pretend to eat salt you can actualy taste it Do this in public. Why was 6 afraid of 7 Numbers can't think This is the original anti joke A man walked into a bar he is an alcoholic and is distroying his family. Fin a penny pick it up and all the day you will have good luck Until you get hit with a car door. A man is SCUBA diving when he is almost out of air so he takes one breath an holds it to the surface The trip is so long that his lungs explode do to a change in pressure so he died.

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what do you call a a miget crossed with a vampire? A miget, vampires are a figment of you're screwed up imagination.

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How do you get a clown off of your property? You ask him politely to get off and if he doesn't, you should contact the authorities immediately.

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Whats worst than reading the 8th anti joke that ends with the Holocaust? The one where it ends with someone getting hit by a fridge for the 9th time.

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Did you here about the Asian couple who had a stupid baby? They named him Sum Ting Wong

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so a salesman knocks on a mans' door and asks if he would like to hear a salespitch but the man didn't answer he came back two minutes later and knocked and asked if the man would be intrested in some girl scout cookies and the man tore the door off the hinges.

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Why didn't little Billy's parents get him the new toy he wanted? Little Billy's parents are dead.

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Asians.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, No, violets are VIOLET, That’s why they’re called “violets.” Edmund Spenser was an idiot.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Dakota Fanning

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A duck, a rabbi, a homosexual, and the president walk into a bar. As a result, bruises appeared on their foreheads.

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Why did Timmy fall down the stairs Because he is blind and I pushed him

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He felt like crossing roads that day.

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Why can't Jeff drive a car? because he is a rock.

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So, a Hispanic, Jewish, Asian man are on a plane. The pilot turns to them and says "Aren't you tired of this?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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