Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

An astronaut walks into a bar. He orders a beer. After waiting for about 1 and a half minutes he receives his beer. The bartender says it was 3 dollars. The astronaut checks his wallet and finds no money so he pays with credit card. The bartender swipes his credit card but the card doesn't work. So the astronaut takes out his debit card. When the bartender swipes the debit card it worked. In relief the astronaut looks at the bartender and says "Thank you" and then goes home.

Hey! Where is my tracker?

What do you call a moving tree? A hurricane killing thousands of people and 3 dogs.

Jack be nimble, Jack be quick... Jack didn't make it over the candle stick and died.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

How many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? I don't know considering it was never done before, and that the size of the pancake would have to be taken into account. Although I would suggest you use a better material like wood, plastic, or metal.

what is funnier than one dead baby in a dumpster? There is nothing funny about the homicide of a minor, and the murder should be immediately investigated.

What should you do when you're constipated? Poop.

FOX News: Fair and balanced

Have you seen Andrea Bocelli's new house? No. He hasn't either.

hello

What did the mom say to her daughter? I love you.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. You honstly thought i would cry over you? Well guess what player, You just got played too!

why did the boy fall of his bike He got shot in the face

What's the difference between black guy and a bucket of shit? The bucket

How do you not get disappointed at the ending for "Mass Effect 3"? Don't play the game, dumbass.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Where am I

How did the plumber fix the leaky faucet? Trick question. The plumber is actually an iguana.

yo mamma's so fat, when she jumped into the ocean, everyone yelled "tsunami!".

Old McDonald had a farm. He grew corn there, and got reasonably wealthy. Then he retired to the Bahamas.

What do you call a dinosaur that doesn't lay eggs? A male dinosaur

Why did little jimmy fall off the building? 9/11

What's worse than getting an erection in church Getting an erection while naked in church

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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