Whats slower than molasses? Slightly thicker molasses.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Hello we are from the church of the latter day saints.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the collage professor say to the plumber? Hi.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Roses are red Violets are blue Last but not least, Bananas are yellow.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

a black guy, a white guy, and an asian guy walked into a bar. It was an interracial bar, and served men and women of all nationalities.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

penis

thumb_up thumb_down +17

your friend is gay, but you are not. nothing happens

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did Santa Claus say to the young boy on Christmas Day? Santa Claus is a myth, that was actually a pedophile.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's the difference between a convertible and a dead baby? One's in my garage, and one's a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Roses are red Violets are blue Why do the following sentences never have anything to do with the roses and violets?

thumb_up thumb_down +17

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Rick Ross is so fat, that he is fatter than someone who isn't as fat as he is.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What would you do for a Klondike bar? Nothing they are disgusting and pollute your body with fats that are not necessary for you to live. -CNN.com 11.78534629/10 scientists agree with this fact.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A blond is on her way driving to the airport when she sees the sign "Airport left." She made a left turn and got to her flight on time.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why do beavers have flat tails? They don't know but their relatives certainly get upset

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Friends are like trees, if you deprive them from water they'll die.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Rebecca Black walks into a bar she took the back seat

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Whats worse than seeing your family killed in front of your eyes? Not much to be honest

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the little asian boy get for his birthday? To work for minimun wage making high quality shoes for greedy white people in North America who dont care about anybody but themselves.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Ding-Dong.............no knock-knocking required

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's the difference between a smashed watermelon and a dead black person? One is a minor slip of the hands and the other is a fatal accident involving a human being.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Im cute hehehee

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops