French man: Bonjour! English man: um, i am not french! french man: oh, My chat is on this beautiful country! Her name is Valentina! English man: What you poo in the open and name them?

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what's the difference between me and callum ? a couple of miles.... and id like to keep it that way

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A dog was barking at a tree

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Roses are grey, Violets are black, I have Alzheimer's, Barthtub.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead.

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whats hairy and fat? I DONT KNOW YOU TELL ME RETARD

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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how many strippers can you fit into a garage? as many as you wanted depending on the size of the garage, but after so many gathered in the same building it is a good probability that some strippers would leave.

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What's worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in two dumpsters

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What's worse than getting bit by a spider? getting bit by two spiders What's worse than getting bit by two spiders? getting raped What's worse than getting raped? a butterfly landing on you

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DON'T READ THIS!!! you suck.

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What do you get if you convict a white man of murder? A black man in prison.

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Two muffins were in the oven...They were taken out after about 40 minutes, and then enjoyed by all.

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Q:Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A:Sea creatures seeking shelter and food

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What killed Hitler? His gas bill.

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Three construction workers are high up on a building when they decide to take their lunch break there. The three open their respective lunches, converse pleasantly, and enjoy the fine weather.

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A dyslexic man walks into a building labeled, Bra. He then thinks he has found heaven but is suprised when all that is served is beer, not milk.

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I like my women how i like my coffee. Without a penis.

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Justin Bieber walks into a bar. He is soon kicked out as he is underage.

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what do call a girl with a waterslide nose? Ava Sherman

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roses are red violets are blue i just made you remember two girls one cup

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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How to kill a mocking bird? Stab it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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