What did the farmer say to the cow that asked for food? No.

roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

If I were in a room with you hitler, stalin, i would shoot hitler and stalin because they are horrible people.

Why didnt jimmy go to school? He had a hangover

How can you kill someone who looks like a squirrel? With an bomb. That would kill most people.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

What's black and gets in trouble a lot? A dog with black fur that has not been well trained.

Whats black, white, and read/red all over? What? Michael Jackson after his surgery.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin get in the car.

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Dave. -Dave who? -Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

What did the the girl say to the deaf boy after he asked her out? He doesn't know

"hey bro" "WHATS UP" "nothin..... I heard you had your first bj yesterday." "YEAH!!" "how'd it taste?" ........

Whats has 6 wheels and can fly? A dumpster, I lied about the flying.

I'm going to Re-write History... History

Once a man asked a lady working at the supermarket, Can I see your avocados? She kindly walked him over to the rack where they were being held.

What do you call a small chinese person? They prefer the term little person to the term midget.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To go hang himself.

Why can't Larry drive? Because he doesn't have his license, and his temps expired!

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor

What's green and looks like a red apple? A green apple

What do you call a white guy surrounded by 5 black guys? The president. -Harrison

Why couldn't the 11-year old get into the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13.

How many cupcakes are there in the world joe How many? I don't know I was asking you.

Stephen Hawkins walks into a bar...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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