Your mom is so old that she has a lot of wrinkles because that's what happens to people when they get old.

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What is a 3 legged dog? It's still a dog! Sheesh

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Why did the blond cross the road? The police officer who arrested her for shoplifting parked his car on the other side of the street.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your friend, George. Oh hi George, I'll be there in a sec.

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Confucius says... He with whom neither slander that gradually soaks into the mind, nor statements that startle like a wound in the flesh, are successful may be called intelligent indeed.

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why couldnt the little boy watch two and a half men? because charlie sheen left and the other guy had surgeery and now has 2 penises

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Did you hear about the guy who got his entire LEFT side ripped off? He's dead.

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Why was Hellen Keller a bad driver? She was a woman.

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Roses are red violets are blue hes for me not for you if by chance you take my place ill take my fist and smash your face

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Hey are you from tennessee? Because I recognize your accent and I grew up there also.

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Yo mama's so fat, she's at risk for a number of obesity related disseases, including diabetes, hypertension, and heart dissease.

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knock knock. who's there? interrupting black lady. wha....... ehmmm hmmmm!

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What do you call cheese that's mine? My cheese

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Why was the ghast from minecraft crying? His family died

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A black man walks into a bar. "Ouch!" He says as the Klu Klux Klan beat him with sticks

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How do you tell if a black man is ok? Poke it with a very long pole and keep your distance...

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what did the nostalgic robot barber say to all of his customers before cutting their hair? 0010101000011100101000100100100110101010100101010101010

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What do you call a person in a morgue? Dead.

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Q. Why did the child's mother tell him to clean his room? A. Because his room was messy.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs skiing? Skip.

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Remember how I made you hypnotically cum by poking your own nose last time? When I told you that hypnotic story about the astrologer and the brain surgeon? So you wet yet? Think about how easy its going to be for me when I take out Mr.Big and slap down your coffee table with it, yeah... Feels cozy down there does it not?

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So this guy walks into a bar, & says "I'll have a beer"........ Yup

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Teacher: which vegetable makes your eyes water? Student: Any vegetable. Teacher: How? Student: Just rub any vegetable in your eyes and see what happens.

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How do you make a little boy cry? You rape his dog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops