What do you call a teenager who cant add? A Total Failure

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What did the doctor say to the recently diagnosed AIDS patient? I'm sorry there is nothing we can do.

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Why didn't the dinosaur cross the road? Because they are extinct and roads did not exist when they were alive.

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Are you trolling with me? I mean how can you know where I live if you have not even picked up the phone yet? Listen, if you wanted to make me upset, you did it okay? You won, I like you a lot and I would never do such a thing. I understand you being upset Nero, I am so sorry, I never meant nor wanted for this to happen, I hope you can forgive me someday.

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Why couldn't the blonde get pregnant? Because she was dead, and her reproductive organs had stopped functioning.

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Why was the youtube like bar green? Because the graphics designer felt like making it green. =.=

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Where do you find a quadriplegic? Where you left him

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How do you get your mom off a clown? hit your mom with an axe

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your mother is so fat that she bought a treadmill and uses it daily. she already lost 20 lbs.

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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Q. What is the difference between an ass kisser and a brown noser? A. Depth Perception.

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You're a country without the "tree". Did you just call me a cunt?

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guess what the clown said to the kid... im a clown

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why did the man die? he had cancer

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What's worse than finding a Holocaust in your apple? The worm

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Your momma so fat.... She's at risk of cardiovascular disease. You should take her to a nutritionist.

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Why can't Stephen Hawking run a marathon? Because it takes years of hard training to accomplish such a remarkable feat.

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I never drink liquor alone... except for when I'm alone.

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Why did the little boy stick a fork in the electrical socket? Because he wanted to escape his abusive stepfather

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What's the difference between a duck and a popsicle? I don't shit on hamsters.

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What did the cat say to the other cat? Woof.

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Apparently I'm an unfit father, cuz all I know is dope and all I got is 30 dollas

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You the same as before? I am being a bit overly cautious I admit that, I would call you, the problem is that while you are either pretty good at pretending to be innocent and all, or actually pretty down to earth, I mean I would probably applaud you for tricking me into believing you are pretty sweet before, but I got my wife and her family to take care off now, its not quite the same getting stabbed in the back anymore,

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how many cucumbers dos it take to change a light bulb? none. cucumbers cant change light bulbs. dumbass.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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