A man walks into a bar but didn't say anything because he is mute.

Why did the burrito taste bad? It's a giraffe.

I wont say I got much money, but neither do I need it, just be honest to me, because if you lie, every advice I give you, could cost you or me everything, our lives, our families... Collateral damage is a term used very often and lightly ever since 9/11

Person 1: Why does food from Subway taste so good? Person 2: I don't know, why? Person 1: Because their ingredients are fresh. Person 2: Um, OK? Person 1: Yeah, it's all under 18. Person 2: Shit...

A man goes in to a town on Friday, stays there for 3 days, and leaves on Friday. How is this possible? He's lying,

Your Momma is so fat when she pressed "up" on the elevator it went crashing down.

Knock, knock! Who's there? orange? orange who? orange ya glad i didn't say your family was dead.

What happens when a building has a 13th floor ? You realize this isn't a del building and fall down 13 flights.

What do you call a man who beats his adopted, black children? A terrible person.

Why did the lemon eat salt? I DON'T KNOW!!

What happened the homeless guy's home? A meteor fell on it.

why did the chicken cross the road? because he was very hungrey and saw some seed on the other side.

I get more excited then my dog when I give her a treat

Why did the man drive into the river? He was sleep deprived from working overtime.

I going to the kitchen to make a #sandwich.....oh wait this isn't twitter

What did the pineapple say to the cucumber? Nothing...the pineapple was incapable of speech, for twas only an infant.

When does a cat not land on its feet? When it lands on its back.

knock knock who's there? Orange Oranges cant talk, so seriously, who's there Your mother Ha ha real funny -mother opens door with her key-

What is a gremlin? A gremlin.

How do you call a hispanic man crossing the border? First you must find out his phone number, then using a different phone make a phone call to him.

Nickleback.

Blah blah something about Ryan Dunn.

What did the wife say to the husband? I'm a man.

two muffins were in an oven, one muffin said to the other, " ohmygod! its so hot in here!" the other muffin said,"AHHHHHH!!!! its a talking muffin!!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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