Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Roses are red, violets are black, you better watch your anus, cause jimmy is back!!

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Why did the man hit the little boy? His brakes failed.

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Why did the man open up a umbrella? Because it was raining..

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What's brown and sticky? Feces.

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So a guy walks into a bar.... he gets a few drinks pays his bill and goes home

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There were 2 drunk men. Man 1:im planning to buy the world. man 2:you cant. man 1:why. man 2: cause im not gonna sell it.

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what do all elephants have in common? they are all monkeys

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What do you get when you stab a baby? A dead baby.

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What crime does a tree commit in order to be sent to prison? Trees on.

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What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

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Why did the little boy throw a clock out of the window? Because he wanted to break it.

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What is worse than the Haulocost? Running across Africa with KFC

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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why is a bad joke like a dull pencil? cuz thers no point!!!!

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Why did the man remain calm when the judge passed the death sentence? Because he was in another country and had no connection with the case.

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What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? Nothing... he looked him up and down and spat at him instead.

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Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

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What did the little boy with cancer get for christmas? Nothing. He was a jew. Jew's don't celebrate christmas.

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(for comedians) I went to a coffee shop the other day. I ordered a coffee then sat down. Behind me there were two people talking. I didn't eves drop because it's impolite so I drank my coffee and left.

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Vote this down and get DOXED

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Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his power level? I can't remember... :(

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an emo kid walks into mcdonalds and orders a happy meal

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Q: What's worse? Inhaling fly spray or deodorant? A: The Holocaust

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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