What's blue and rhymes purple? Get Out

why did the asian man get straight A's? because he worked hard and studied everyday

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he has no sense of living and no muscles to move.

Who's obsessed with death and love to make jokes about it? The majority of the contributors in this site.

knock knock Person A: who's there Person A: oh shit that was me

What is a jew in space? Dead

What do you call a police woman who shaves her pubes? PC Marion Jones

why did the homeless man die? because everyone does.

How many ecotards does it take to change a light globe? Ve Vill Change all ze light globes to use;less grey vuns and you vill luv it or else ve vill kill you to save ze planet

Why was Shane cool... Because he was a cool bean.

What dog keeps the best time? All dogs will keep reasonably good time as far as their care is concerned, if they have a stable home routine.

Mack: Hello Jonathan: Hi Mack: My name is Mack, what's your name? Jonathan: My name is Billy Mack: You liar! I'm reading this post at anti-joke.com and whenever you reply, your name shows Johnathan! Johnathan: Well Mack, I guess you broke the 4th wall. By the way, this joke is over in 3, 2, 1...

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What did the hispanic say to the black guy? I'm not sure. I wasn't listening because eavesdropping is rude.

What starts with F and ends with UCK? Firetruck What starts with P and ends with ORN? Popcorn What starts with B and ends with ITCH? Bewitch

A nun, a jew, and a black walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

"I am proud to be black and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Not racist. "I am proud to be white and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Racist and offensive to black people "I am proud to be asian and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Not racist "I am proud to be Ethiopian and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Said nobody, ever

whats the difference between a black guy and and an asian person... who cares kill them both

Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

Knock knock Who's there? To To who? No, Sir, it is "to whom"

Why would you kill a black man? Well, murderers have different motives, the most common of these are revenge or a psychological illness.

Your grandma's cookies.

What did the red apple say when it saw a black man an irish man, and an asian walk into a bar? nothing apples cant talk.

A guy killed his kids and wife Pokémon GO also exists

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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