Knock knock How is ? Bond ,James Bond!

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Whats the difference between a crucifixion and a circumcision? In crucifixion you throw out the whole Jew.

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A potato walked into a bar and ordered a large bowl of french fries

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What's the heaviest part of an elephant? Its body.

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Joe used to always talk about his family and his two wonderful kids Joe can no longer talk to or about his family because his smoking habits have gotten out of control

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Why didn't Charlie Sheen lose? Because he's always winning.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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What's the difference between a brick and Ricky? A brick gets laid and has a higher iq

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Why was the woman crying? Because I hit her with a bat.

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What's a foot long and slippery, a slipper

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Darude- Sandstorm

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how do you get a girl of a swing? puch her off! how do you get her friend of a swing? throw a refridgerator at her!

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How old is your mom Dead

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Whats black, white, and red all over? Hot sauce on a checkerboard.

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What colour is a black man in a freezer black

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What did the baby say to it's mother as it was being thrown in the trash bin? Nothing, it couldn't talk yet.

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Why couldn't kitty drink it's milk?\ It's face was nailed to the floor

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How do you make a retard make a sound like a dog? Douse him in gasoline and light him on fire. WOOF!

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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Knock knock Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? Dr. Jeremy Brown, I have your results from the blood test. It's good news they came back negative. Hooray.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a boy scout? The boy scout comes home from camp

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When is a door not a door? When your burns down.

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Q. what sucks A. getting robbed loosing your family and then you die by cancer

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What's the only think duct tape can't fix? Your parents divorce.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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