If a canoe is stuck in a tree with its headlights on, howmany pancakes does it take to cover the roof of my house? False, snakes don't have armpits!

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What did the kid say when his parents were killed? Nothing. He's a vegetable

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Q: What did the passengers think of thier Chineese bus driver? A: They were very pleased with the bus driver's service, for he was a very safe driver and got them to their destination on time.

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Is your refridgerator running? good, because if it wasn't then your food would spoil.

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A man and a woman walk into a bar... They both die from cerebral hemorrhages.

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A gay man walks into a pregnant woman

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Women's Rights

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I used to be an adventurer, but then I decided to retire.

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Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The chicken

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Why did the Mexican mow lawns? He needed money to pay for his college tuition.

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Why did the man sit down? Because he was tired of standing up.

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When someone throws a rock at you What do you say? A:Oww

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What is a life without options.... an optionless life

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So you are "The Nero" are you not? How ironic... ...I got nothing on you, let me ask you however, why did you quit the underground society? What changed your lifestyle so much? I mean I accept that you did not do it out of fear or cowardice, but why did you leave it up to the rest of us to try to hold together the last remains of freedom and social information? What? To use your techniques in order to entrance people into buying your books? How is that so different? I am not saying that I consider your methods lesser, because nobody here does, but if you can explain how this makes you better, I would appreciate it, I am certain that most people would.

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I like my coffee like i like my woman.... with big titis.

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Why did the girl cross the road? Doesn't matter she got hit by a bus.

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What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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~Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? ~ ~He was dead. ~ ~Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? ~ ~He was stapled to the monkey!!!

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You know what makes no cents? 100 cents because 100 cents make a dollar.

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why did the woman call the police? because there was a murderer pointing a gun at her at her son.

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what happens when you punt a baby in between 2 poles? you get 3 points

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Whats better then having 10 fingers Having 11

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Why did? Yes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops