What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

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Q: Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? A: Because drawing a perfect circle is impossible for any human. Actually a perfect circle doesn't exist.

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Two fish were lying on a bank. One said "I can't breath." The other one was dead.

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What do you call a black man walking home in the dark after a long day at work? His name you racist

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A horse walks into a barn.

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How do you dance to the black eyed peas? You don't you listen

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how do you get a happy man to stop smiling? hit him in the face repeatedly untill he is dead.

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What do animals eat at the beach? Sandwitches

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Why did the black guy smell fried chicken? He had a brain tumour

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Why can't Amy Winehouse sing? She's dead.

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Friends are like potato, when you eat them die.

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Where did Little Sally go after the bombing? Everywhere.

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What did the duck say to the moose? Quack

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What's the difference between Hitler and Stalin? Nothing because pineapples aren't vegetables.

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What do you call three Asian people eating a cat? A tragic last resort for a starving family.

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A woman crashes her car into a pole Thier family is suing for a hit and run

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What do you call the fear of anteaters? Stupid.

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What kind of dance does an alien do? None, aliens aren't real.

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A young girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

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What makes men cry? The realization that humanity is completely pointless in the infinitely expanding universe and thus any action to try and improve human life is also a complete farce.

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Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

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I bought one of those anti-bullying wristbands, when they first came out. Well, I say bought. I actually stole it from a short, fat ginger kid.

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three friends are chilling one day and they all think they belong in Guinness book of world records the first guys says i believe i have the smallest arms in the world, the second guy says i believe i have the smallest nose in the world and the third guy says i hate to admit it but i believe i have the smallest dick in the world. So they all go down to Guinness book of world records inc. and the first guy comes out and says "YES I DO HAVE THE SMALLEST ARMS IN THE WORLD" the second guy comes out and says "YES I DO HAVE THE SMALLEST NOSE IN THE WORLD" the third guy comes out all depressed and mad and says "WHO THE HELL IS JUSTIN BIEBER"

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Justin Bieber

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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