- Anti Joke

What do a vampire and a ginger have in common they're both afraid of the sunligh- oh wait this anti jokes ohhhhhhh oh well

So a man walks into a bar, asks for a beer, then drinks it. He then goes home expecting to have dinner with his wife and 2 kids. His wife smells his breath before that and asks him what happens. The men opens to his true and only love and tells her he's having a bad time at work. So they share a hug and talk about it. The man is then renewed, starts pulling up at his job and gets a promotion to general supervisor. He lives happily and watches his kids grow and become professionals. He then dies of a heart attack at the advanced age of 89 while he was watching his favorite TV show.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Polite cow who recognizes normal social cues and civilly waits for its turn to contribute to a conversation. Polite cow who recognizes normal social cues and civilly waits for its turn to contribute to a conversation who? Moo.

Their is a stripper, a prostitute, and a pole dancer on a plane that is about to crash. They all die.

Your mom is so fat, every time she swims in the ocean, north america sinks because of the high water displacement caused by her giant body mass. (V1-V2=m)

Rebecca Black starts to sing a song, and when breaking out into her annoying chorus, we realize that it's not about the days of the week.

How did the 8 year old child die? He was raped at the age of 7 and given the STD of AIDS. His clock then started as his family cried about his final days of his life.

how do you wake up lady gaga? you set her alarm for the intended time

An Irishman and an Englishman are in a bar. Suddenly a wild Dragonite attacks. The Englishman promptly catches the pokemon and continues to enjoy his drink with his Irish friend.

oh hai

'A blonde', 'a brunette', and 'a redhead' are ways of referring to women who have hair of a certain color.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

roses are red violets should be purple

What's black and hangs from the trees in my backyard? Black berries!

What do you call a man with cheese on his face? His name is David.

I used to be an adventurer like you...but then I was diagnosed with cancer.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being in an abusive relationship.

Two peanuts were walking down the street, one was assaulted, the other was brutally raped.

What's worse than a pile of dead babies? People that make dead baby jokes.

Why is the fat kid on the ground crying? Because I hit him with a shovel

HOLY SHIT!!!!

GONNA

What did the man with Alzheimer's get for Christmas? Happy New Year!

Q: What do you call the first black guy who swam in the ocean? A: Triangle.

7 chickens ran down the road. One ate a spider. He is now the fattest chicken.