How do you drop a raw egg on to the floor without cracking it? Any way you want, it is very hard to crack concrete.

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First speaker: "why are there so many anti-jokes about something walking into a bar!?!? Second speaker: "there are only a couple thousand of them." First speaker: "it is getting so damn annoying!" Second speaker: "Well, that's too bad for you" The first speaker proceeds in stabbing himself with a knife while laughing hysterecly. First speaker: "ha ha ha ha" Second speaker "emo."

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Yo momma is so fat that we are incredibly concerned for her health.

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what do u call a long dik gay guy Gay Dickerson

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planned on writing you all an antijoke decided i wouldn't.

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What is grey and transparent? An elephant in a zip-lock bag.

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What rhymes with popscicle and weighs at least 300 pounds? Your mom. I lied about the popsicle.

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What do you call a black man driving a police car? Officer

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Why are tootsie rolls brown? because they are....

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i am an inbred jew who likes penis up my bum ~Nathan Barras

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Yo mama is so fat that she has to buy plus size clothes because small size clothes would be inappropriate for her to wear.

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I came home from my doctor`s appointment today, I told my sister that I was diagnosed with The Super rare "Spontaneous Erections Syndrome" (S.E.S) a very rare disease that can seriously impair the victims life in general, especially the social life, as symptoms may show themselves even among friends, pets, grandmas, enemies, and even close family! She told me that everybody knows I a just a kinky pervert with bulge so big it scared girls away instead of attracting them. Excuse me, what the hell is patient confidentiality good for if my doctor is going to call my sister and tell her everything she said to me afterwards?!

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roses are red violets are blue i ate a peanut lets go have sex

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How many dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dogs do not have aposable thumbs therefore they cannot screw in light bulbs

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What has two legs but can't walk? A quadriplegic man who lost mobility in his legs due to a horrific logging accident.

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The WNBA

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Whats big red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater.

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Twenty-Four

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Why did John go outside? His house was on fire.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your Apple? Ebola

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What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match.

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Do knock-knock jokes apply to homeless people?

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What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life changes and moves on, in addition to taking the daily appropriate amount of medical prescription as directed by her doctor.

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What do you call the man who graduated medical school last in his class? Doctor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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