What did the german get for christmas? an Easy-Bake oven and a G.I. Jew

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A man named Cecil walks into a bar. He then orders a drink.

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What did the blind lady say to her cat? Nothing she doesn't have a cat.

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Did you hear about the big Polish tragedy? There was a power outage in Poland's busiest shopping mall, People were stuck on the escalators for 4 hours. A woman gave birth in the elevator and died.

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Why cant Michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? because he is dying of parkinson's disease.

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why did the ginger get made fun of? because he had red hair

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Your mother is so stupid she couldn't get a passing score on a standardized test.

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What's green and red and goes a hundred miles an hour? A frog in a blender.

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A hitman and his target walked in the same bar togather what happend? nothing because a hitman has better things to do and the target would lay low.

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whats black and red all over? a chalk board

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America were the American dream is something only foreigners believe in

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Why did the house get trashed? Cause the babysitter was a rooster

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What's green and has wheels? The Holocaust. I lied about the green and the wheels.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Bat-mobile? - "Robin, get in the Bat-mobile"

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I agree

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A japanese man enters a Honda dealership and is approached by an eager salesman. The salesman shows him a few models and then asks him curiously "What do they call Honda in Japan?" The japanese man answered "Honda"

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If anyone can read me... I am Michael Jackson and I would really appreciate if someone could get me out of this... box... I mean help! Where am I! I think I have been under a long coma and would appreciate any small boys digging me out... Moral: I hope there is no hell... for my own sake that is...

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A horse walks into a bar. "Why the long face?" the bartender asks. The horse kills everyone in the bar and stampedes the other horses into town.

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Knock knock Who's there? To To be continued.

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You wanna hear something dirty? A pile of garbage. That's dirty.

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What did the fat guy say to the skinny guy? You're skinny

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what does the sloth say to dylan sedgwick nothing dylan is the sloth

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Why did the baby cross the road? A very uncaring parent left their infant outside. The unsupervised baby then crawled under the fence and began to head towards the road. When the baby began to cross the road, there were two cars coming from both directions. Luckily, they saw the baby and came to an abrupt stop. Unfortunately, when the baby made it to the other side, an eagle swooped down and snatched the baby, because it is a bird of prey. Fortunately, the child's life was spared by the eagle. The Department of Child Services showed up later only to confiscate the baby from the parents. The eagle wanted to adopt it, but it could not speak nor could it sign the legal documents because it was an eagle.

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Q. What's brown and circular? A. MEATBALLS!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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