What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

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How do you starve a blonde? You tie them up and deprive them of any food.

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Why did the blonde fail her driving test? She was paralyzed and had down syndrome.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? "THE chicken" indicates a definite article, you really would have to specify which chicken you're talking about so i can identify whether i was there at the given moment that the chicken tried to cross the road and to ask it his reason for attempting it.

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What is the defference between an apple and a banana? Horses, because vests have no sleeves.

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Wanna hear a dead baby joke? Of course you don't. they're sick and disgusting and enjoyment of one merits only the deepest of society's hatred and scorn.

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Chuck Norris doesn't answer the phone - he doesn't have one at the moment

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I was born.

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What do you call a fat man in a tiny pipe? Stuck.

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A man walks into a bar, and says "ow."

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whats better than a car. gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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Sticks and stones can break my bones And words can make me lonely

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BALLS! said the Queen if i had them i would be King

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The IRS. You didn't pay your taxes so we have to take you to jail.

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Ask me if I'm a human! - Are you a human? No. The correct term would be a human being.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A Pokemon pencil!!! A Pokemon pencil who? I just found a Pokemon pencil next to my computer when I was playing pokemon!!! LMFAO!

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What's the difference between Vagisil and Black People? They are disgusting!

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Black History Month

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3 friends are out camping. One says to the other "It sure is a great day to go fishing." The other says "Yes indeed." The third one says "I agree." After a few minutes of hiking, they go to lake and begin fishing.

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What did the hobo find on the ground? A dirty nipple. ~Logan F.

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There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

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How many women does it take to change a lightbulb. None, Thomas Edison was a man.

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Justin Bieber walks into a bar. -sensored-

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THEN WHO WAS FONE?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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