What do you call someone who takes a toaster into their bath? Adele's number one fan.

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John - hey do you have tickets to see Oasis? Sam - No I bought green day tickets intead. John rolls his eyes at sam very dissapointedly then proceeds to go home. The next day Sam phones John excitedly telling him he traded his Green day tickets for Oasis tickets, a smile appears on Johns and Sams faces, not that they can see each other, they both then put the phone down. An African died. Green Day are a bad band.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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What's Donald Trump's favorite color?

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Why wasn't the rabbit elgible to vote? Because rabbits aren't human beings, and only humans are allowed to vote.

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Going to bed? Mind if I Slytherin?

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What do you call a black man with his doctorate in the field of marine biology? Doctor

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What's worse than getting a detention? Slavery...just kidding that was a good thing!

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What did Squidqard say to Spongebob? Shut up.

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What is the greatest anti-joke ever told? I had it right here, but I lost it when I was being raped by a Triceratops.

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whats funny ? not you i am telling the joke around here

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what is stupid and reading this you

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can i have a cookie no diabeto!

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Why does Santa Claus not have children? Because he only comes once a year.

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My mom caught me masturbating.

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Q: What is worse than The Apocalypse? A: Darkseid, Thanathos, Red Hulk, Onslaught, come on The Apocalypse cant even beat the X-men! Moral: "I AM THE APOCALYPSE, YOU ARE NOT FIT TO SURVIVE!"

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What did the girl with no arms get for Christmas? Mittens

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This is not a joke.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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how do you take a shit in public? pull down your pants and push in public

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

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what's red and blue? your heart

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Justin Beiber and a speaker = no hearing within a 25 mile area

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how did the little girl die cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops