Why did Hellen Keller drive off of the cliff? Because she is a woman.

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Why did sally drop her drink? Because she was hit by a bus. Knock Knock. "whos there?" Not sally.

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Roses are red, Violets aren't. This doesn't make sense. Potatoes and brown.

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You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't divide by zero.

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How many squirrels does it take to screw out a light bulb? None because squirrels lack the strength and mind set to screw out a light bulb.

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A detective? I think more about that chip and dale thing, that was not funny, the classics are okay I suppose, but that newer thing detective-ish maybe. Uh... Do I get a clue? I have not like watched all of them.

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What's worse than finding gum on your shoe? Being molested by a sea urchin.

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A guy watches TMJBtv on YouTube. He then shoots himself.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Why are VIOLETS blue?

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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The motto of those who live in the Bible Belt; "The Bible Belt: Where being obese is 'Genetic' but being homosexual is a 'lifestyle choice'."

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What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? A) The color of their hair.

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Why did the boy jump off a cliff Because he was gay and committed suicide

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knock knock whoses there whose home whoses home who? you

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven is a serial rapist and has been harrassing six for months.

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why did the black guy where orange shoes? Because he likes orange.

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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What did the hooker say to the black guy? How long do you want it for?

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i like turtles

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Two Scientologists walk into a bar. For $5,000 you can hear the rest of this joke.

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A woman walked into a bar. Many men laughed at this unthinkable notion because women belong in the kitchen.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running away from KFC.

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Hey what did you do on The weekend??? I got hit by a bus!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops