Your mother is so fat, when she stepped on a scale, it read quite a large number. She resolved to live healthier and exercise more.

Whats brown and sticky? Brown paint,

A man invites his Irish friend to his house. "Would you like something to drink?" the man asks. "Just kidding, we don't have any drinks." Later, they die of dehydration.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Jews are human beings. Pizza is a type of food.

knock knock who's there? the police, we have a warrant for your arrest.

Why did Quinn yell at his group project partner? Because he hated him.

Don't read this or I'll be angry ...…...... Darn you...

When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

G

Matt Gregory Harrington is a bender, pylon, hoser, duster tripod, and puck bunny!!!!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, come at me again and I'll punch you

Q. How do you wake up a sleeping rich man? A. By splashing acid in his face

i remember when i was a child i wanted a skateboard but my parents would never buy me one so late one night i crept downstairs and got a hammer and some wood and i beat them to death my foster parents baught me 5 skateboards

A muslim walks out of a plane.

What did the blind deaf kid get for Christmas? Cancer.

What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

Roses are blue Violets are too I've got Alzheimer Roses are red

Why can't Benitio Mussolini win the war? Becuase he's dead.

Two cats are sat on a window ledge. One cat looks to the other and says "Meoww".

A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

Q: What's worse than having a terrorist throw a fridge at you? A: World War 5

How do you know you're crazy? Consult the pink pheasent to your left

What would you do if I said a horse ate your mother? It doesn't mattet, I didn't

A Muslim gets off his plane from Saudi Arabia to New York and walks to customs where a TSA agent asks him "what is you business in America?" The Muslim responds "I am here for a vacation". He walks on, and returns home 10 days later.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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