A Muslim, a Jew and a Christian are on an airplane talking about religion. The Jew tells the Christian he believes in a single holy entity. The Christian says he believe Christ is the Son of that very same entity. The Muslim says "When can I get out of this room?" because he's been detained at the airport due to religious profiling.

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What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

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What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

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what did the paraplegic get for his birthday? a bike...

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What do you do to a woman who has a black eye? Punch her in the other eye so that they match.

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A man found out that he had hit the lottery and would be receiving 300 million dollars, but he had to fly to china to do so. The man took a plane to China from New York and would arrive within the next several hours. Meanwhile, in australia a god-cow was producing infinitely large amounts of concentrated milk. His milk was so infinitely large in mass that it collapsed on its own mass and turned into black hole; absorbing the entire Earth. The man never got to receive his money from winning the lottery

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Q:whats the wost thing that can happen to you when you find something? A:not finding something

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Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English.It is confused by it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was scary.. made by Kevin Kool

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What's funnier than the holocaust? Just about everything seeing how the holocaust is not a funny event, but rather enormous tragedy.... Assholes.

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HOW TO RE-AD : FOR DUMMIES. (HELLEN KELLER ADDITION)

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Someone chucked a fridge at her.

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A paralysed man falls over.

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what do the parents of a starved family do? kill their kids chop them up into little pieces and eat them.

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SUCK MY NUTS

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Why did the man have square fingers? Because he has Apert Syndrome

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karn chevalier

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What's sadder than a lost puppy? A dead puppy.

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Seriously, I am going to tell you, but you know, what would you have preferred that it was if you could choose, I am kinda insecure about these things, and people can read these messages so...

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Coach walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says, i can't serve you. You aren't wearing pants. Coach says "put it on my bill."

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Q why did the girl scream A she got hit with an axe

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Its linked with the process of extracting uranium isotopes, but lets change the subject, with that said, I hope you can help me with some management advice such as the one you gave me, I will of course pay you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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