why did the family get sick?? because i fucked a girl with a parsnip then sold the parsnip to a family with 4 small children

Bill: Hey Scott, do you have the time? John: My name is John, you must have mistaken me for someone else. Bill: Oh. I apologize for the inconvenience. John: No problem. By the way, the time is 3:34. Bill: I don't actually need the time, me and Scott just have this inside joke of me asking the time when we both very well know that he refuses to wear a wristwatch. John: Alright

Why are black people so good at basketball because they can jump shoot and steel

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 brutally raped and murdered 32.

What's brown and liquidy? Brown paint.

What's black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get slaughtered.

Q: How did the black man own the Lamborgini? A: He was 2 Chainz.

Why did the boy take the girls backpack? he has this many hands

Have you accepted Jesus Christ as your lord and savior?

I used to say "I used to be an adventurer like you but then I took an arrow to the knee" like you but then I took an arrow in the knee.

How do you confuse a blonde? Try and teach her the finer points of Quantum Physics without allowing her to take any notes, and then test her on it.

I woke up today

What has 8 legs and 1 eye? 2 chairs and half a fish.

Two peanuts were crossing a road. One was salted.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a florist.

If life hands you lemons, take them they taste good

So 2 apples are having sex, and one apple sais to the other, I got worms.

An man walks into a bar and then proceeds to purchase an alcoholic drink.

what do santa clause and a blueberry have in common they both have beards....except the blueberry

why did the white guy go to a black mans yard sale? to get his stuff back

The Jewish boy asks his dad for 50 dollars His dad says " 40 dollars? what do you need 30 dollars for? "

What did the dubstep say? Wub.

Life is like a box of chocolates. The worst ones remind you of how horrible your life is.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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