My name is me I like fired chicken!

Why did Susan fall of the swing? She had no arms... Knock Knock... Who's there? Not Susan...

What did the White guy say to the balck guy? "How are you?"

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle.

What do you call a person with an axe stuck to his head? What's your name?

What do you do if you see a black man in your backyard with a bullet wound in his head? Take him to the hospital.

Whats the difference between garlic bread and a Jewish person? Garlic bread doesn't scream in the oven.

dyslexics of the world untie!

Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she cant use it, she is fat.

Cat ate a battery, did volts.

What do you call a Mad Cow? Dead. Pst, Mr.Cobb if your reading this- Hola.

Your momma's so fat, she died on the operating table during her bypass surgery.

A 10 year old underpriveledged boy goes to the second mile camp and meets his new counselor: Penn State defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky. The two bond very much and talk a lot. Sandusky invites the boy back to the locker room to shower because the boy got muddy. The boy takes a shower, gets clean, and goes back to his cabin. The boy has a great time at the camp and goes home.

What do blueberries, oranges, watermelons, doors, curtains, backpacks, spoons, asian men, bicycles, asian men on bicycles, shrimp, books, eagles, dinosaurs, watermelons wearing backpacks filled with shrimp and orange spoons, feet, limes, binders, paper, candles, chicken nuggets, tvs, chairs, floors, refridgerators, and humidifiers have in common? Barnes and Noble

Doctor: I'm sorry about your disease, young man. It looks like your time is up. Man: NO! How much time to I have? Doctor: Five. Man: Five years? Five months? Five weeks? Doctor: Four... Three...

Whats blue and flufft Answer: Blue Fluff

knock knock whos their a person

Why can't monkeys and kuala bears get along? Because they are two entirely different species that cannot communicate with each other...

Anne frank dies days before camp was liberated.

how do you get a scouters power level to 9,000? power levels dont exist in real life therefore cannot reach 9,000

ok... let me think of something good! Write Your Own It's easy to take part, just type your text below! ok... let me think of something good! Write Your Own It's easy to take part, just type your text below! ok lets... wait.. wtf I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

Billy was taking a stroll in the forest, when suddenly he met a bear. Billy remember what his father had taught him, and quikly lied down on the ground, pretending to be dead. The bear started licking Billy's face. Still he remained calm. The bear bit off Billys finger. Still he did not move. When the bear ate Billy's foot, he nearly panicked. But thinking of his wife and children he mustered his last remaining strenght, and did not move a muscle. If he tried to run or fight the bear he would surely die and never see them again. Then the bear ate Billys head.

Aye I heard somethin about yo mom WAT!!!!!!!!! She a bop

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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