- Anti Joke

If you have 12 apples and 7 oranges in one hand, and 9 apples and 10 oranges in one hand, what do you have? Very large hands.

'A blonde', 'a brunette', and 'a redhead' are ways of referring to women who have hair of a certain color.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To make it home in time for Thanksgiving.

A Polar Bear walks into a bar and says to the barman: "Barman! Give me a whiskey and ............................................................coke." The barman says: "Why the big pause?" to which the Polar bear replies: "Well uhm my father had big paws"

Knock, Knock. Who's there? No reply cause Kyle got knocked out by the door.

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What's green, covered in cookie crumbs, and lies in a ditch? A Girl Scout that was hit by a car.

If John had eight apples and he eats three. Calculate the mass of the sun.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I got Alzheimer's! ...... Who the hell are you?

what did the women say when she saw a tiger maul a rabbit? she didn't see it, she was in the kitchen cooking and ironing

Two doctors were performing open heart surgery on a 54-year old woman. The surgery was a success, and she is now living comfortably in Portland, OR. She enjoys sweet tea.

Where do cows go when they're bored? Wherever they're standing. Cows cannot use toilets, regardless of their mood.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike.

What's worse than the Holocost? Two worms in your apple.

EVAN RAMSEY -CAD CLASS!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Your mother is so retarded. How retarded is she? Very retarded.

When making an Anti-Joke, you click the button that says: 'I have read and agree to the terms of service' What are you called? A Liar.

Whats worse than losing The Game? The Holocaust

Why is a dog smarter than a human? Because you an asshole if you believe me

There is no I in Pie except for the I

What did the cancer patient get for his birthday HIV

What's Big and Round? My Testicular Cancer

Eat My Food!!! Joking I dont have any food

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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