What do you call a person rolling down a hill, in a burning car, with a pack of wolves running after him? DEAD!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Friends are like potato, when you eat them die.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

The Pope, Queen Elizabeth and a schoolboy are on a plane that is going to crash. It crashes and they all die instantly.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q.What did the German say when he walked into the bar? A.Ich möchte ein Bier bitte. Das würde mich viel besser fühlen. Meine Frau ist gerade gestorben, weil ich sie zu Tode prügeln, und ich bin ein Alkoholiker.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What kind of words did the terrorist say on his date? His last ones.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's worse than finding a Worm in your Apple? being Mauled to death.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Bitch please, you're adopted as well.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Knock Kock Who's there? Boo Boo who The ghost from Mario

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A straight A star quarterback in his senior year of high school was about to throw the game winning pass in his season's last game and complete the school's undefeated record when he was sacked by a defender. He fell incorrectly and broke both of his legs, rendering all of his scholarships invalid. He hasn't walked since.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

how do you get a happy man to stop smiling? hit him in the face repeatedly untill he is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did Superman say when he forgot his cape? "Where's my cape?"

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I tell the Doctor I'm having pains in my chest. He says that sounds serious and admits me immediately to the hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what did the jew say when the arab threw rocks at him? He didnt, the israeli air force proceeded to fire white phosphorous missiles and annihalated many small children and babies in the process, the aftermath is still around today.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

If video games were peaceful. Man! You are so strait! That was so good man! GG.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

With the exception of pigs, both pigs and blue jays can fly

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What does the funeral director say at a jewish funeral? Ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes...

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the girl fall from the swing? She was laughing at an anti-joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why did the man die? he was shot

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is the difference between a girl and a woman? Age

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A duck quacks in a mountain range. No one on or nearby the mountains hears the duck because ducks' quacks don't echo.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What happens, when you give a blonde a Computer? She uses it like any other person because her haircolor has nothing to do with her Intelligence

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Someone threw a fridge at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did Mary fall off the swing. She had no arms Knock knock Whis there Not Mary.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Your momma is so old that she might die soon!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops