Why did the Jew wear a beanie while playing soccer? Because he shaved his head

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A man walks into a bar and sees a large jar filled to the brim with $20 bills. He asks the bartender why there is so much money in the jar, and the bartender tells him that he has a horse in the back of the building, and he has a bet that if someone puts $20 in the jar and can make the horse laugh, then they will win all the money. The man, feeling confident, puts his money into the jar and tries to make the horse laugh. It is a horse, so of course he cannot make it laugh. He leaves, dejectedly, having just wasted 20 of his hard earned dollers.

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After dinner, my girlfriend told me that we should go to my room to play with eachother's toys. It was very fun, I've always enjoyed the plastic dinosaur she decided to bring over.

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Roses are Violets, Violets are Roses, I am a dumb ass, The Hobbit.

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Men's Sports

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Your mother is so fat that she is highly likely to get heart disease and/or diabetes.

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Yo mom is so fat and stupid that she used butter to get through the doorway, but she ate it

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ask me if I'm a tree.. are you a tree? no.

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A girl gets raped -teagan d

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What's worse than reading a bad joke Realizing it's yours.

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Chuck Norris' punch is so powerful that is falls on the downward slope of the bell curve for punch force of adult males.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Chickens like to wander around.

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A doctor is delivering a baby on April fool's day. He says, "Congradulations, it's a boy." He then says,"April fools! Your child was stillborn."

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Nobody knows why she swallowed the fly, she probably won't die.

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What did one cannibal set to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

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What do 9 out of 10 people like? Gang rape.

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My grandmother always said "slow and steady wins the race."...... She died in a fire

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Why did Bob Marley Shoot the Sheriff? Because he was black.

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What do you call a black man who walks into a jail cell? A hard working and dedicated police officer who was just putting his first offender in jail.

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Woman's rights.

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What did the cast of sex and the city get for Christmas Nothing Sarah Jessica Parker is Jewish

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What's the difference between a dead cat and a dead woman? It is much more unlikely that you would have sex with a dead cat.

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Where did Susie go after an explosion? Everywhere

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A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a chair.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops