I dont know, are you a tomato?

I farted!!!!! t'was smelly??????? I LIKE CRABS! #tomato problems

what rhymes with pirates? not Somalia because i don't consider a inflatable boat a pirate ship.

What are we then hypocrites?

Yo mama so fat, that when she wore a blue swimsuit to the beach and swam, the Blue Whales started sing, "WE ARE FAAMILY...EVEN THOUGH UR BUGGER THAN ME!!!"

Police Report: A 100 year old man was beaten to death on his centennial birthday. Sources claim to say he was "getting his birthday punches"

Why did the Muslim enter the bar? He didn't.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

Why did Jack got late to his date? Because he was playing Call of Duty and forgot about the time.

Why did the child get hit by a bus? He was blind.

Chuck Norris didn't rape yo mama, yo mama raped chuck norris!

Why do women wear perfume and makeup? Because they smell bad and are ugly.

How could you ever watch a man hit another man and say nothing? UFC is on at 9:00pm.

A Man walks in to a bar and orders a pint of lager, he notices something floating on the top of his drink so he calls over the bartender. "Excuse me, I think there's something in my dr-" The man's sentence was cut short as a man with a gun had just walked into the bar. He killed everyone, there were no survivors.

knock knock who's there i lost my wallet my nan died

Knock Knock! Who's there? Pen. Pen who? Pen is blue.

knock knock go away

Billy: hey dave, wanna hear a joke? Dave: what? Billy: oh yeah, you are deaf.

Where do babies come from? My garage

What's the difference between you and a mallet with a cold? Ones a sick duck...I forget what I was about to say but your mother is a whore

What happened to the starving african kid? He died

What did the police officer say to the black man? "I am a police officer."

Why did the chicken cross the road? 24

How many dead babies can fit in a dead horse 11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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