How old is the old man? Probably how old he is

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why did the small child drop his icecream? he was hit by a bus

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Bob: What's gucci bro Tim: Is that a company?

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A businessman notices an attractive woman sitting at the end of the bar so he buys her a drink. She kindly accepts and spends a few minutes making pleasant conversation with him. When she's finished with her drink, she promptly begins to flirt with another man at the bar who's not twenty years older than her and horribly out of shape. The middle-aged businessman, realizing his own mortality, proceeds to spend the rest of the evening drinking himself into vortex of loneliness.

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Why did Little Billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a washing machine.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because chickens can move and the road just happened to be in its path.

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A. I have a really funny knock knock joke to tell you! You start. B. Knock knock A. Who's there? B. ....

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c+t+c?

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whydid the little boy drown? he can't swim

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What's worse than losing your job? Getting thrown into the sun.

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Where did the eight year old go during the Boston bombing? Everywhere.

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Knock! Knock! Whose there? Chris Chris who? (There was never a response. Leaving the man to wonder who Chris was... Was it his high school buddy Chris? His former colleague? That guy who filled his propane tank down at the gas station? Was that guy's name even Chris-or was it Craig? Craig, it was definitely Craig.)

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What's worse then being HIV positive? Catching the cold the next day.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a Gun Get in the Van

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why did the chicken cross the road? To prove to the possum it can be done.

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how did the thirteen year old girl get pregnant? she was raped.

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Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt. He actually got halfway across the road and was struck by a fast moving car. There is now a memorial on the side of the road mourning his death...

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what kind of panda eats leaves? the gray one :D

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My Japanese girlfriend just broke up with me. It's okay, there's more of them in the sea.

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A man was drinking vodka at his friends party. He got a headache. He told his friend, and his friend said that there was asprin in the cabinet. The man ate some. He died. He was stabbed from behind, and the blade pierced his lungs.

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WILSON!!!!!!!!!

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Knock Knock. Who the hells there? Nevermind.

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How do you escape a vicious tiger? You cleverly create a distraction so the tiger's focus is not on you. Then, you quickly run away because the tiger doesn't know you are leaving.

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What did the black man do when i shit in he's pant? Changed pants.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops