Where do rabbais go to shop? At the supermarket like everyone else.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? -one is the chosen people of Isreal and one is a food that was founded in Italy

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Bill: Knock, Knock. Sean: Who's there? Bill: It's your neighbor, Bill Walters, from across the street. Sean: Oh, hey Bill, how are you and Margie? Bill: Oh, I'm doing fine, but Margie just got out of the hospital for a broken arm. Sean: My gosh, what happened. Bill: She was just loading the Halloween decorations down from the attic while I wasn't home and fell. She's fine though; it was only a minor fracture. Sean: Well thank goodness she alright. Bill: Anyway, I came over to return those hedge clippers I borrowed from you last month. Sean: Oh, thank you. How did they work? Bill: Just great once I gave them a coat of oil. It was a big job... I haven't trimmed those bushes in three years. Sean: Yeah, these clippers have belonged to my grandfather, father, and me. Bill: Darn, thats quite amazing, I wish I could get a pair of those, but I doubt they still make them. Sean: I'm pretty confident they don't, but you can borrow these anytime. Bill: Thanks Sean thats very generous of you. Sean: No problem, I almost never use them myself. Well I better get back to Jeanie...I'm helping her make dinner. Bill: Alright, Well thanks again.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Your mom is so stupid she had a hard time graduating high school.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's the sound of victory? The sound of a knife cutting into a baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I scream! You scream! - You've Just Been Rapped

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why can't the dinosaur eat M&M's? He is dead. He used to rule the Earth 65 Million years ago, though. Dinosaurs are reptiles. Whales are not. Meow?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is funnier than dead babies? Dead babies aren't funny, Carlos Mencia and Tom Bergeron are funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats the different between a black man and white man...... the different levels melanin in the skin that results in pigment

thumb_up thumb_down +6

the website says jokes, yet these are all facts.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the black man say to the jewish man? Hello.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Funny joke to play on an elderly woman: Take her cane and push her In front of a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

You might be a redneck if you are from a rural area and act as such.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Whats funnier than a jew holding a nickel. Nothing. Jews are cheap.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's white and can't climb a tree? A refridgerator What's white heavy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A polar bear

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man walks into a doctor's office, he pees in a cup and is diagnosed with diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What di the wrecking ball say to the house? Duck!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

dave lee travis walks into a radio station , plays some records , talks randomly , and a good time is had by all.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

your mom is so black that it can be assumed she is of african descent

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why didn't Tommy walk to school? 'Cause he was in a wheelchair..

thumb_up thumb_down +2

q: Why does my grandpa climbs a phone pole with a bag of bananas? a: He likes to climb and he might get hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops