What do you call a dog with no legs Nothing it won't come

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Q: Why didnt jim win the race ? A: Because he swalowed his tounge.

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When my brother was hanging at YOUR cross, he asked "daddy" "Oh father why!" Then lightning struck and the weather went to fuck. Moral: WHAT KIND OF RESPONSE IS THAT YOU PIECE OF SHIT!?

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Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

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What do u get when you mix a young asian woman and a black man? Tiger Woods

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What were the pilots' of Malaysia Airlines Missing plane favourite programs? Lost...

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "why the long face?" The horse replies "my whole family was killed in 911... And I used the money I got from life insurance to get plastic surgery to always have a smile on my face. My doctor botched the surgery, so now my face is elongated. Even for a horse, of course."

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A boy plays in his garden. Then he fall and his knee hurts a lot, but he doesn't cry. Do you know why? Because he's dead.

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Your legs are more open than my back door! Which is closed.

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How do you put a baby to sleep? Snap its neck.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Cuz he was black.

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? Depending on the size of the car, you should be able to safely fit somewhere between 2 and 8.

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Why did Suzy have burns on her face? Because her little brother attacked her with a hot curling iron thinking it was a lightsaber.

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Knock Knock Fuck off. I am new here. I do not know anyone here.

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How do you make a pool table laugh? You cant it is'nt a living thing which means emotions.

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What happens when a baby stops crying? it dies.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a serial-rapist with links to the Black Dragon triad. Yee.

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When is a bus not a bus? When it turns into a street

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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I can prove I'm a psychic - this post is going to receive a lot of dislikes.

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How many blond girls does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, it is a faily simple task

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What do you call a white man without a face? Dead. What do you call a black man without a head? Negger.

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2 muffins are in a oven for 30 minutes, the baker then questions why he only baked 2 muffins.

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what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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