Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

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Why did the little boy lose his fingers? He was left unattended with a chain saw.

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When a fat lady walks by what do u think? R u fat or pregnant

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How do you blindfold a Chinese man? With a blindfold.

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Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

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I still remember the last thing my grandfather said before he kicked the bucket. He said: "Hey, I wonder how far I can kick this bucket."

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What do you call a man whos had his arms ripped off in front of you? An ambulance, because with an injury such as this, you can die anywhere between 10 and 45 minutes

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where do you find a dog with no legs? Korea. It's customary for the guests to get the drumsticks.

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What is yellow and bright? The sun.

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A blind man walks into a bar, and a table, and a chair.

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A woman sees a sign on a store that says "husbands for sale." Curious, she walks inside. The clerk says "These men will be perfect husbands, they'll cook and clean for you and see to your every need." Shocked, the woman calls the police and reports the store for human trafficking.

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Q: There is an Elf King, King Kong, and Godzilla all on the empire state building. Which one jumps first? A: None, because none of them exist.

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womens rights

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How do you keep an elephant from charging? Ask nicely.

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What do you call a half-Latino, half-Asian baby? The product of a healthy interracial couple.

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What did the schoolgirl say to some of the people of Anti-Joke.com? You're sick. Stop talking about the Holocaust.

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What's worse than finding 16 dead babies in a tree? Finding 1 dead baby in 16 trees.

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Only people of high intelligence can laugh at anti jokes.

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Seriously, I am going to tell you, but you know, what would you have preferred that it was if you could choose, I am kinda insecure about these things, and people can read these messages so...

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of lollipop? unknown.

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Why did the squirrel cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

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ms caissie is secretly laughing at these...

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whats the difference between a fat person and a skinny person ? there weight.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops