yo mama is so fat she has more rolls than basken robins does flavors

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Whats the difference between a jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a stove or firepit while jews are functioning members of society.

What did the dog say to the other dog? Ruff, hi, ruff ruff, we are both dogs ruff ruff, ruff ruff, ruff!!

Why did the war end? Because one country surrendered. They were getting beat pretty bad, it seemed like the only viable option.

Yo mama so dumb she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl! I'm sorry,that was just really rude of me. I've been talking to my therapist and I think this insolent behavior came from my dad. I always wanted his approval but he always liked my brother more and blah blah yak yak.....

How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? you open the door and guide him inside

Cripples are lame.

Why did the cookie go to the doctor, beause he was feeling really crumby...becuase he has testicular cancer

What did the german speech therapist say to his mute patient? There a few methods we can use to help you obtain the power of speech.

Buy a SHOTGUN!!!!

Whats black and white and musty? A nuns pussy because it never gets used.

Your mom is so ugly and stupid that people make fun of her and that's not nice.

Why doesn't a ducks quack echo? Actually, it does, but the echo is imperceptible to human ears.

Q: Whats better than not being a Jew? A: Being a Jew.

What's Black, white, green, and red? To bloody zebras fighting over a pickle

Roses are shut the f*** up. Violets are shut the f*** up. Shut the f*** up. Shut the f*** up.

Send creepy emails to this email address: matt.harrington@highlandcatholic.org

Yolo is for losers, I have 9 lives...meow

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Why did she fall again? Because somebody put her back on. Why wasn't she able to hug her dad? Because she has no dad.

Why did the guy run out of the whorehouse? Because when she spread her legs it looked like she was pulling apart a grilled ham and cheese sandwich.

Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

How you know when dislextic

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...